Patri's Rants.
"Stereotypically Female Tonight: Analyzing an offensive Eric
Clapton song"
I'll admit, I used to like this song. Its kinda catchy, kinda
romantic. Like many other things in our culture, it holds up fine
when we don't really look at it, but upon further inspection,
turns out to be perpetrating the sort of negative female images
that some of us find reprehensible. Maybe you've heard the song.
It says something about someone looking wonderful a lot, right?
And they go to a party or something? You probably don't remember
much more, because people don't really pay attention to song lyrics,
advertising messages, or the subtext behind images (I suggest
you start).
WONDERFUL TONIGHT by Eric Clapton
It's late in the evening; she's wondering what clothes to wear.
She puts on her make-up and brushes her long blonde hair.
And then she asks me, "Do I look all right?"
And I say, "Yes, you look wonderful tonight."
The song begins with a common
ritual in our culture: A couple is preparing to go out. It is
quickly implied that the woman has much more to worry about in
terms of personal grooming and appearance - the man's preparations
are never even mentioned, and we can assume by his presence that
they have been completed. The female stereotypes begin to appear
immediately - she is worried about what clothes to wear. She puts
on make-up, assumed necessary for any formal outing. Since she
is a woman and being adored, she is of course beautiful, and since
she is beautiful, her hair is, of course, long and blonde. And,
of course, despite being beautiful, she is insecure, and has to
ask the man whether she looks ok. Naturally he replies in the
affirmative, the only possible answer for such a question.
We go a party and everyone turns to see
This beautiful lady that's walking around with me.
And then she asks me, "Do you feel all right?"
And I say, "Yes, I feel wonderful tonight."
In the next
stanza, they arrive at the party, and immediately attract attention.
Not because the guests have been eagerly awaiting their arrival,
not because they are particularly liked or welcome or charming,
but because one of them is a hot babe. The implication of the
phrase "everyone turns to see/This beautiful lady that's
walking around with me" is clearly that of a trophy ("everyone
turns to see/the glittering Rolex that's keeping the time for
me"). The man's pride is evident - he has something that
others desire. The woman is being noticed only for her physical
qualities. It is unclear why she then asks him whether he feels
alright, but it certainly seems indicative of a lack of communication
in their relationship, which is not at all surprising. Perhaps
she wishes to actually initiate conversation, rather than just
hang on his arm, but if so, the wish fails. Still basking in the
partygoers envy, he replies that he feels wonderful, and leaves
it at that.
I feel wonderful because I see
The love light in your eyes.
And the wonder of it all
Is that you just don't realize how much I love you.
Next, the narrator attempts
to justify his feelings. He feels wonderful because of the love
he sees in her (undoubtedly blue) eyes. I suppose being adored
by a beautiful object is all it takes to make him feel wonderful.
He then says that she doesn't realize how much he loves her, perhaps
because she is a woman, and thus a creature too simple to really
understand a man, or perhaps because of the lack of communication
between the couple, which is doubtless being exacerbated by his
focus on her personal appearance and grooming. Why he loves her
we cannot be sure, since he has not once mentioned any of her
thoughts, interests, passions, or anything else that might inspire
genuine emotion.
It's time to go home now and I've got an aching head,
So I give her the car keys and she helps me to bed.
And then I tell her, as I turn out the light,
I say, "My darling, you were wonderful tonight.
Oh my darling, you were wonderful tonight."
The final stanza actually
contains a little bit of redemption. In the first two lines, the
female is actually viewed as a partner, a peer, an individual
who can be useful. The man has become weary, and the female takes
over, piloting the vehicle home and helping the man to bed. Her
role has changed from the trophy to the mother, which is at least
a slight improvement. The stanza closes with the man telling the
woman that "you were wonderful tonight." Given that
the song has not mentioned any witty comments that she made, any
conversations which she was a part of, or any of her behavior
at the party besides simply walking in and looking gorgeous, we
must assume that success at being attractive is what she is being
complimented for, thus reinforcing the behavior.
This song is a classic example of the kind of media images with
which we are bombarded every day. Pretending to be a simple tale
of a happy couple, it reinforces negative female stereotypes and
dysfunctional relationship models. I am not suggesting that this
was intentional on the part of the songwriter, he may have been
as much a victim as we are - perhaps this is what his evenings
and relationships have been like (if so, I feel sorry for him).
We need to promote positive images and learn to recognize hidden
assumptions that are made. All it takes is a little knowledge,
a little awareness, and a lot of cynism, and the attempted brainwashing
will start to become transparent.
For more information on the subject of culture, women, and beauty,
I highly recommend the book "The Beauty Myth", which
is on Amazon here.
Last Modified: March, 2000
Patri
Friedman / patri@izzy.com